Friday, May 14, 2010

Confessions I Own

Oh wow…the weeks fly by.  I confess on Fridays and feel great.  Then I fuck up all week….only so I can confess again!  Geesh!  The cycle is getting old!!  But, once again, I link up to confess….Why don’t you??

Friday confessional

I confess….

Last night, when the tween and the spouse were fighting about freakin’ Barbies…..something about the tween insisting they still belonged to her, when Lil Lady has been playing with them for months…yet the tween decided she once again liked Barbies…..and the fight went on and on as I was trying to take a relaxing bath….yep, I pretty much wanted to exit out the bathroom window and not come back for a very long time.  






Also last night when Lil Lady agreed to fall asleep in her OWN bed as long as I read a story, I was so pleased that the spouse and I wouldn’t have this 30 pound lump between us in our bed. 

Then I was just as disgruntled after I read the book to her, told her I’d be right back to check on her, yet when I came back she was gone…..Only to be found in MY BED!!  WTF people??  I need a break.

I seriously want to run off with or without the spouse.  The kids need to stay home.

I’m sure they can take care of themselves.  They can change each other’s diapers…and if not, maybe they will be potty trained when we get home.

They can eat pretzels and pasta (I’ll make sure it’s made in advance….wouldn’t want a toddler using the stove while we are gone).

The Little Man knows how to open the fridge and get a yogurt out.  I hope the tween will open it for him when he asks.  I can’t expect too much from the Little Man…he’s only 2.

The Little Lady will keep the tween in line, I’m sure of it.  After all, she’s like 30 years old in that little 3 year old body.

I confess that I don’t care who knows I want to leave my dysfunctional children alone while I go lay on a beach somewhere with some Jamaican serving me frozen drinks with little umbrellas in them.

I confess also that I blame the “other parties involved” for the dysfunctionalism of the the children.  There is no WAY they get this behavior from ME!

I’ve had a lot of thoughts about wine and medication this week.



I think that thought alone is telling me I need a break.

I just might partake in the wine and meds this weekend.

I want to send the tween to some sort of school that teaches her how to wake up in the morning and how to go to sleep at night.  A school like that exists, yes??  Please say yes…..

I bought yet another pair of cheater reading glasses.

That makes three pairs.

I still can’t see well.

I’m getting old.

I would seriously like my vacation before I’m too old to enjoy it.



I also confess that even though my children make me crazy and they make me want to pull every last hair out of my head on a daily basis, I love them, and I wouldn’t have it any other way.

Well, maybe that last statement was a lie.  I certainly would like my same children, but I would like them to not destroy the house, and go to bed on time, and NOT sleep in MY bed, and not squeeze their juice boxes on the dining room floor, and NOT throw tantrums over fucking BARBIES!!!!  Yes, I want PERFECT children….is that asking too much?????  I want them to look like THIS:


Oh…..wait….they DO look like that!!  Damn…..

Cute, eh??

Yes, I am blessed……

I confess that I often forget that part of it, the blessing part.  So I need to keep that in check now and then or I seriously might crawl out that bathroom window the next time!!

Have a great WEEKEND!!!


Rebecca said...

I want both of those wine glasses...right now! I want the wine and the pills and I want it right now...have I made myself clear.

Some of the best wars in our house were over Barbies...they never go away. When my mother finally thought my sister and I were finished, my brother wanted them b/c he would burn their that point, she realized she had bigger fish to fry!

sammy said...

hmmm, im half jamaican. i'll serve you drinks if i can drink too.

there is NOTHING wrong with needing/desiring/taking some adult time. your kids would actually thank you for it if they could.

drink a glass for me ; )

Aunt Juicebox said...

Awww, they are SO cute! I'd still cut and run if I had the chance though. LOL

Lourie said...

I often want to run away. It's just a mom thing. If there is a school out there that teaches the tween to sleep at night and wake up in the morning I bet it costs a fortune.

*LLUVIA* said...

Sometimes i want to leave and not come back in long time!! lol

Kat said...

I gave you something on my blog because I totally get your blog and love you lots for being there for me!

Cheeseboy said...

Pretzels and pasta sound terrific.

Also, if you figure out how to keep your kids from destroying the house, please let us know.

You deserve a trip.

Dual Mom said...

Yeah they are pretty cute. And would totally be able to look after themselves for a few days. Just leave out water dishes. They may be too short to reach the faucet.

Linda Medrano said...

Those kids are adorable! That said, I'm going to make a suggestion. I have two crates both were for Harry when he first came to us. We kept one in the kitchen and one up in the bedroom. They are a fairly good size since he is large. Now to keep your children safe while you go to the beach and drink fruity rum drinks, have you considered crating them? I think that works like a charm. Just leave a box of crackers and water in the crates.