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Wednesday, January 27, 2010

WTH? Is that What I Meant to Say?

This is a new one for me….not the saying, but joining in on this post of What The Hell Wednesday that I stumbled across over at a Blue Monkey Butt, a blog that belongs to two sisters, Elle and Stacy.  I kid you not, the phrase “What the Hell???” comes out of my mouth at least daily if not more often.  And sometimes it comes out as “WTF???”  but that would probably have to be a WTF Friday post.   So, if you want to play, click the button below and have at it!!
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The first moment that comes to mind is what is currently going on in my house right this very minute!!  The spouse has the toddlers in the tub, I hear alot of laughter, water spashing.  I was taking this moment to clean up dinner dishes, pick up toys, and maybe get in a quick blog.  The spouse sends me a text…

“If you aren’t busy, and if you are done with the clean up, why don’t you come on in and chat?”

First of all, a TEXT??  Our house is far from being mansion size.  I can hear him a mile away with his booming voice.  And he sends a TEXT? 

What the hell is wrong with this picture???  Modern technology, bite my ass, I would like to have a real conversation with my spouse at some point thank you very much.  So, I will end here and go “chat” with the spouse.  Don’t you worry, I’ll be back very soon.

tick tock

tick tock tick tock

 tick tock tick tock…

Ok, I am back.

The next thing that comes to mind is when I am typing away, you know, when you’re really on a roll?  You don’t have to lookkkkk at what you are typing…you can just kkkkkkkkkeep going and going and going and then when you takkke a breath and go to proof read what you have typed……like now……kkk  You look at what is on the screen and say WHAT THE HELL??  Again…thank you Little Man for removing my “K” from my laptop keyboard so that now it won’t stay on.  I love you dearly, but I could kicckk your sweet little ass to China for this one!!

Speaking of Little Man, he’s been going through a stage where he has the need to dump everything out…whether it’s a box of toys, a box of books, a container of cars, or a box of fish crackers-it doesn’t matter, he dumps them!  The one day he dumped the entire box of fish crackers on the kitchen floor right in front of the hubby and I.  We looked at each other, he knew I was ready to blow a gasket so he said “I got it”.  Ok then, while you “have it”, be sure to move the rolling cabinet because I am sure they flew under there too. 
I leave the kitchen for a few minutes.  Sooner than I think he could have swept the floor and moved the cabinet, I see him back on the computer.  I go back to the kitchen only to find the Little Man still eating fish crackers off the floor….

….ALOT of fish crackers…..still there….all over the floor.   I ask the dear spouse, “are you seriously done??”  He says, “he was sitting on those”…meaning the Little Man with the “little ass” was sitting on at least a half a box of fish crackers.  I was dumb-founded.  What the hell??  You have got to be kidding me.  At this point I was truly speechless as the tween walks in to assess the situation….she sums it up for me as she says….”he was sitting on ALL of those????”  in her sweet, innocent voice. 
 
The tween and I look at eachother…..

We look back at the floor…..

And for the first time everrrrrr, I hear her say…somewhat timidly, but she says it….. ”What the hell??”

He comes in the kitchen, and once again I hear “I got it”….and I say, “oh no, I GOT IT.” 

And this is where this post needs to turn to What I Meant To Say Wednesdays sponsored by Chief over at Hiding From the Kids!!  Oh yeah, and you all thought I would not take the chance to weasel this one in here too?  Wrong!!  How can you have a “what the hell” moment and not follow it with “What I Meant to Say”??  So,  if you wanna play along with this one, hop on over to her awesome blog by clickkkkking (damn “k” again) on the following:

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And now, let’s back up.  When I said to the spouse, “oh no, I GOT IT” , I bit my tongue because this is WHAT I MEANT TO SAY:

“Alrighty you adult-sized child!!  If you say you GOT it you better HAVE it!  If I have to come and supervise you sweeping up the effing fish crackers AND make sure that you move the cabinet that I suggested that you move in the first place, then I might as well do it myself!  The point of YOU doing it was so that I didn’t blow a gasket.  The point was NOT for you to do it half-assed and then for me to come and re-do it.  Just because you walk around in the the tight white T-shirt that rocks my boat and gets the netherlands tingling does NOT give you the right to be a slacker and then think you will be getting any nookie when we hit the hay.  If you are going to leave half the fish crackers on the floor then you can also leave your tight white t-shirt in your drawer because I am just not going to be in the MOOD!!  Am I making myself clear???”

So…there ya have it.  My What the Hell moments along with What I Meant to Say.  I look forward to linking up with both of the sponsoring sites and seeing what you have come up with.

BTW…what I meant to say was:  “What the hell are you waiting for??  Get blogging and get linking already!!”

…..and have a nice day.

11 comments:

Adoption of Jane said...

I feel your pain, My daughter texts me when she's sitting right next to me.. WTH?!

SuziCate said...

The kids text me while in the house and the hubby calls (from cell phone) when he's in the yard!!!

The Princess of Sarcasm said...

My hubby yells at me from the other room and expects me to come see what he wants. Ummm...if YOU need ME...YOU come find ME!!! I am not a puppy.

Brittney said...

Lol EVERYTIME i ask my hubby to do something he half-asses it and then wonders why I bitch! Hmmmm!!

Corrie Howe said...

I've thought of texting husband or son in other parts of house, but I haven't. I've wished we had an intercom system.

I don't have this issue with my husband, but with my teenage son. If you're going to do it, do it right. Grrrr.

Thanks for dropping by my blog...wherever you came from. ;-)

The Blue Zoo said...

Love how you mixed the 2 memes!

My husband does everything half assed. If he ever did anything right I'd probably die from shock.

Chief said...

What the hell wednesdays!

why didnt I think of that?

Thanks for playing!

Stacy said...

My husband sends me texts all day long from work...but when he gets home from work we don't have one conversation! My husband wouldn't even of said, "I got it" he would of looked at me and walked over the crackers! Men! Sometimes they just suck

Thanks for joining us today!! You made me laugh!

Kmama said...

OMG, I love that the tween muttered What the hell. That's priceless.

Her Majesty Lisa (LadyWanderlust) said...

WTH? You actually have time to blog between answering your hubby's text, cleaning up the under-the-ass fish crackers, and all the other crap you have to do?

Hang in there! Lisa

Elle said...

I've given up and will text our 20 year old daughter since it's actually easier, but that's where I draw the line.

Thanks for joining us for WTHW!!