The Pig Label

So, we all know that the H1N1 (swine flu, pig flu, deadly flu) is pretty serious, right? Absolutely. Especially if you are elderly and frail, a young child, a person with underlying medical conditions, or pregnant. What I don't understand is that if it is such a serious thing going on, a flu pandemic is what they are calling it, why on earth are the ER's taking it so nonchalantly and diagnosing everyone that has a stuffy nose with it?? Why, when I go in the ER today and just start talking about symptoms do they slap a mask on my face??

Seriously, if they could be a little quicker with their assessments, I wouldn't have to sit with other people potentially contaminating them. You'd think by now they would have come up with a "room" or "pig sty" for those having certain symptoms to wait in. This way the pigs can be separated from those with sprained ankles or hip dislocations....I'm just saying....

According to the ER, I am just another "pig in a blanket". No, I am not a croissant-wrapped mini hotdog you'd find at a cocktail party, but I have been labeled as having the H1N1/SWINE FLU. I realize we need to trust in our doctors, but come on folks....yes, I had the symptoms of the swine flu that started last Friday, but today I went in the ER because I was having trouble breathing. You know, the big SOB....No, no, no, nobody called me or you a SOB, and I certainly did NOT call the ER doc a Sonofa-Beeotch....although I would have liked to. SOB stands for Shortness Of Breath...and I was having it, of THAT I can be certain. Apparantly this ER doesn't treat that sort of thing when it's in conjunction with swine flu symptoms even if you had said flu symptoms 4-5 days ago and are not having any of those symptoms at the moment. I would NOT have gone to the ER for flu symptoms, and I didn't. I went because my doc was not available, another doc I called could not fit me in until the next day in which case I might not be writing this blog, and I could not breathe!! My head was ready to explode, my eye sockets hurt, my nose is so stuffed I couldn't even smell the Vicks Vapor Rub I rubbed on my chest the night before. To me, all those things indicate sinus infection or maybe some serious chest congestion.....of course, how would I know? It's only MY body which happens to have a BRAIN...one that has 20 years nursing experience and the initials RN, BSN after my name....Do you THINK I know when I need an antibiotic? And does this ER doc THINK I was asking for an antibiotic for the flu which is viral and won't respond to an antibiotic?? Oh come on...let's be serious....

This ER doc stood at least 5 feet away from me because I was wearing the dreaded PIG paraphenalia....you got it...the "PIG MASK".

The conversation went like this:

ER Doc: And what brings you in today? (All I heard was, "Pig, how are you feeling?")

Me: Shortness of breath, bronchospasms. Was sick last Friday, better with all that. Just thinking I have a sinus infection/need my lungs checked. A little dizzy. My ears are blocked. My head hurts. My eye sockets HURT! I can't smell Vicks VapoRub!!! (what I really wanted to say was, "Like Bacon, doc, fried...")

ER Doc: Probably H1N1, you need rest, fluids, tylenol.

He then very carefully reaches out with his stethescope and with his 4 foot rubber arm he listened to my lungs. I inhaled deeply...well, as deeply as I could before hacking my left lung out, and he said, "your lungs are good". Really? Seriously?? Can you just hand me my lung that's laying on the floor, please??

ER Doc: No need for a chest xray. You need to follow up with your doctor or return here if you have trouble breathing or any dizziness.

Me: Ummm....that's why I'm here today.....cough cough HACK (Oink, oink, oink....)

ER Doc: (after a pause) So, Nursey Nurse will be in with your discharge instructions. You get your rest, kiddo.

You've gotta be shittin me!! Ok...So Nursey Nurse comes in with my discharge instructions and a script from the doc that says "no work today or tomorrow". Is this what they go to medical school for now-a-days?? Un-freakin-believable!!! Now, I leave the ER hacking my lungs out, no antibiotic, pay a $75 deductible with nothing to show for it other than a note from the doc saying to not work this day and the next....I speak with my work supervisor and mention the craziness of the ER doc and how could he label me as having H1N1 when no testing was done!!??? Guess what she says?? Just guess...come on, you can do it.....

......waiting.......

OK. I'll tell you. She says, "Since you have H1N1, you need to bring a note from your doctor releasing you back to work." WTF?? Did she not hear me say that doc was a whack-job?? And I need a note!??? I have a note saying when NOT to work...isn't that enough? Do I have to see MY doc and then pay another $25 for him to say I DON'T have the PIG FLU now even if I did before???? At this point I am really a little embarrassed to be a part of our medical profession. This is NOT how I was taught in school...actually, I think what was lacking here was just plain old common sense.......

So, yes, having the pig flu is quite devastating. Not only do I get the "PIG LABEL", I lose income because my supervisor has lost her freaking common sense! I already feel like crap being sick, and now I feel even worse. I can't even cough in public, even if I use the "sleeze" protocol (you know, when you don't have a tissue and you cough in your sleeve?) It doesn't matter because I've been told I have the H1N1, so now I think everyone knows!! I think people are afraid of me!! I might as well have the plague....

And if this isn't enough, not only has the PIG come and stolen my dignity, the PIG has stolen my maid! Since I've been sick, she has not done shit around here!! Now that I'm feeling better, I think I will get on that issue......

Take care everyone, and beware, the PIG is NOT YOUR FRIEND! I do not care how cute they may appear......

Another Divorce

Dear Scale,

I am writing to tell you that I am leaving you. The last 3 weeks with you has been worse than ever. Mostly because I am working so hard trying to keep up with the Body After Baby Challenge that I found over at MamaNotes, but it's also because you don't do ANYTHING! I swear, you mock me. I walk into the (bath)room and you just sit there. I step on you ever so gently and you do the same freakin' thing every time! There's never a change, and because of this, our relationship has gone stale.

What we once shared is now in the past. I don't see any future for us here. If maybe you could have given me just a little encouragement. Just a little spark of recognition when I would come to you. That's all I've ever asked. I have never wanted you to GIVE me things ie. diamonds, gold, POUNDS....all I've asked is that you take things AWAY. You haven't even been kind enough to do that for me.

After how I've cared for you over the years. Made sure the kids didn't abuse you. Made sure nobody moved you from your perfect spot in the bathroom corner. I made sure I kept your surface wiped clean at all times. I swear, where's the justice in how I've been treated by you? You act like you know what I'm doing at all times. Like if I don't drink enough water, you know it! If I have lunch at Applebees, you KNOW it. It's horrible. Just horrible....I feel like I don't have a life with you around, just WAITING for me to screw up! I've had it. You have beaten me down to my lowest low. You have treated me like some hysterical fat lady - deciding to make your numbers rise by 5 in just one weekend. WTF is THAT?? HUH?? I am not HYSTERICAL...I am just someone who wants some recognition for what she's trying to accomplish.

So, I'm sorry to say, this is my good-bye to you. I cannot take it anymore.

Incidentally, I have been seeing your cousin who lives in the basement bathroom, and have been treated just a little more nicely. If only you could have done what he has done...if you would have just spiced things up a bit, yeah...it all could have been different.

Am I a Scary Mommy?

Well...this should be an easy one to answer, right? I should definitely say NO, I am not scary!! But Jill over at Scary Mommy is searching for a Mommy that is scary....Wait...I have to stop right here and tell you what's really SCARY, and please, don't laugh...I am considered an educated person....lmao...ok, are you ready?? Ok...I thought SCARY was spelled SCAREY!! Yep...I did....*blushing*.....even looked it up so that my post would not have any errors.....

Anyhoozle....Initially I thought, hell no! I am not a scary Mommy but then thought back over the years with my children...and ohhhh, I bet there are times that they would have considered me to be pretty scary. In fact, my two toddlers are still being taught exactly HOW scary I can be. For instance, the other day when the Little Man (he's 19 months) was in the bathroom (somehow the door was left open leaving him full access) and I walked in on him just about to put his hand in the toilet....what would you do?? That's right, I screamed!! And when I say screamed, I mean I let out a howl that any wearwolf would be proud of. I let it rip and roll and ya know what? I scared the living crap out of that little Man! And what's worse is that I was proud, yes I was PROUD that my howling stopped him dead in his tracks and he did not stick his hand in the toilet bowl. Instead, he very nonchalantly picked up the roll of toilet paper (no, it wasn't on the holder, that would be too much work) and tossed it in....Oh YES-HE-DID....

Then I thought back to the time when my oldest daughter was having a difficult time going to sleep at night. Not that things have changed, but I've become a little less disturbed by it. This one particular time was when she had a loft bed. You know, a bed on stilts? Yeah, so I had to keep ushering her back in there over and over and over and over...you get the picture. Then instead of getting out of bed (because I am so scary she knew I meant business) she decided to keep calling for me to come to her. And I did. Over and over and over and over.....you seeing how this is going? I was at my wits end....she called me in for the last time. The bed was high, I am short. She was too far for me to reach but oh did I want to reach her. So, what did I do? In my sweetest voice I could muster with entirely too much mommy adrenaline coursing through my veins, I told her to come closer. (evil witch laugh...) She moved a little closer....(evil evil evil Mommy). I still could not reach her. Yes, I am that short. I said, "oh honey...just a little closer...." and she came just close enough and WHACK!! I got her!! And yes, I was once again proud of my Mommy skills. Trust me...she was shocked....but that was the end of it for the night. And if you are thinking I'm one of those mommies that whacks her children often...think again...otherwise, would she have come any closer no matter how much I asked??

There have been times that I have felt totally out of control. I have to admit that being a mom has made me aware of my inner most demon. (Oh stop, we all have one) Sometimes I have so much hostility over the strangest things that my children do, yet when it's serious I seem to have it under wraps for the most part. I don't beat my children, oh no, I tend to take it out on inanimate objects. Like the wall in the basement that sort of has a hole in it? Yeah....don't tell my husband...shhhhhhh. But it's hard being a mommy, isn't it? I went from being the mom of one to having 2 more after 10 years, and I tell you, I think that we are given a certain amount of patience when we are born, and when you use it up, that's it...it's gone, and you become one of THOSE MOMMIES.....the SCARY ONES!

I do know my limits though. And if I forget them, I always have my 3 year old to remind me. Like the time she comes walking into the kitchen and says, "Don't be mad, My Mommy, I didn't do nothing." THIS is always a bad thing. Always always always!! And yes, somehow I have gone from being "Ma-Ma" to "Mommy" to "Mom" to "My Mommy".....I think she's being a little possessive if you ask me. Anyways, I go to the other room where she "didn't do anything" and she had taken the Pinkxav (you know, the butt cream that is pink that is NOT water-soluble that does NOT wash off) and covered my dining room chair with it. Oh yes....she definitely DID do SOMETHING! Of course, I wouldn't want to traumatize the sweet little thing, so I took it out on the older child. Yeah, NOT a proud moment for me, but damn!! Can't she help watch the little ones sometimes?? Does she always have to be doing homework or doing something crafty? Does she have to be such a KID? She's 12 for Pete's Sake!

So, in retrospect, I am apparantly a very Scary Mommy. I love my children more than life and I would do anything for them. That includes wiping their tears when they aren't invited to a special friend's party, kissing away the boo-boo's on their baby dolls knees, cutting the crust off their bread, making noodles everyday because that's all they will eat, reading Cinderella 20 times in one night, curling up on the couch with the Little Man when he doesn't want to be in his crib, letting my 3 year old cover my arms (nearly free of any hair now) with stickers, and sitting on the floor for hours doing the same puzzle over and over....it includes the good and the bad, and with the bad sometimes you get the SCARY....not the SCAR-E-Y....but in the end, when the Little Man puts his head on my shoulder to fall asleep, and the 3 year old goes into her OWN bed on her OWN, and the 12 year old says "Mom, I love you...you're the best"...it's worth all the scarey moments in the world! There's nothing better and nothing SCARIER than being MOM!!

Silly Kid gets away....

I came across this contest for Silly Kid Photos and wouldn't ya know it, I have THREE!! (not 3 photos...THREE KIDS..) The contest is sponsored by Hasbro. Hasbro has a collection called Elefun & Friends which you just have to go check out! Christmas is right around the corner whether you want to think of it or not, so why not do some early shopping?? I know I will be! Having 2 toddlers....ahhh...imagine the credit card damage I could do??? Scarey to think about it!!

Anyhoo, since I can only submit one photo for the contest...it took me a while to decide. I chose this one of Manny since he apparantly is the silliest at the moment. I am so glad this doggie-door fiasco is in the past!!

Of course, there are many more silly photos to be gotten in the future! Of that I am certain!!

Have a great day! Oh, and if you want, the contest can be found over at 5 Minutes for Mom!!

My Little Man is 19 months, 8 days, 1 hour and 32 minutes old. In that time he has caused me to cry with joy, wince with pain, laugh until the tears rolled down my face, grab my chest and inhale as if I was having a heart attack, and gasp in disbelief. Until Manny, I had no idea what it was like to raise a little boy. I had no idea the never-ending energy of a boy. I had NO IDEA a child could do the things he does...No FREAKIN IDEA!!

He can eat enough for an entire family......in one sitting! My 2 girls eat like birds...little baby birds, in fact. On the other hand, Manny can devour 2 slices of toast, grapes, bacon, sausage AND spaghetti for breakfast....Yes, I said "spaghetti for breakfast"...his father is Sicilian for Pete's Sake!!

From very early on, Manny knew how to take a toy and stand on it to make himself higher. I've never had my house so full of gates until this little Man came into my life. I never had to baby-proof my house until THE MAN showed up. He's gone over gates, under gates...in fact, he can close this folding gate faster than I can!! We eventually put the gates away.

This may not have been the best idea we've had as parents.....


and.......

Now, anyone who has children knows that you give up alot...your sleep, your last french fry, your most favorite flannel pants to the tween, your sanity....but if you hold onto ONE thing, let it be your sense of humor!

A sense of humor can brighten up your life. To hear a child laugh can bring you far from in the dumps to a place where it just doesn't matter if you have no cream for your coffee, or that someone left toothpaste in the sink, or that your house is in total disarray. I have heard that children won't remember how clean the house was when they were growing up, but they WILL remember any quality time you spent with them. Some people think a sense of humor is part of our genetic make-up like brown eyes, big ears or monkey feet, but in fact, a sense of humor is learned. It can help you connect with your children and it can make them healthier and better able to handle difficult situations. Yeah...this is what I keep telling myself when I find my little Man in a precarious situation........this is healthy, this is normal, this is NOT a preview of what he will be doing when he gets to college.......

.......right???

Goodbye Poptart

Yes, once again I am blogging about weight loss. What's different about my weight-loss blogging? In my blog you won't find recipes (not at this time), you won't find my food journal (that would be too embarrassing), but you will find a whole lota bitchin about how I can't seem to stick with any weight-loss program. I personally feel that we all have to go through this phase first before we really get serious about losing any weight.

I don't know how people do it....IT being LOSE WEIGHT or get fit after being UNFIT....especially after having children (3 to be exact, 2 of which came along after turning 40). I've tried Weight Watchers. I think I had a problem with WW because I decided I would go for the full-treatment and actually PAY for the program which included the weekly meetings and weigh-ins. I would like to say, in a nice way, that I did not like the meetings...I did not like any of the people there, especially the leader who wore a name tag that also stated "in 1989 I lost 13 pounds". WTF?? Ok...so that's great, 13 pounds, but does that make her an expert? Does that give her the right to mock the 30 pounds I would like to lose? Needless to say, I could not go to those meetings and look at that name tag and feel good about anything.

I've joined an online weight-loss 8-week challenge called Body After Baby.

This challenge is brought to you by Samantha over at this cool site called
Mama Notes. I think I've lost track of what week we are on!! Nooooo! Really?? I believe we are on week 3. Last week flew by and I think I accumulated 1 point, the total possible was 28....WHAT??? This week the mini-challenge is to see how many healthy meals we can eat. A "healthy meal" consists of at least two food groups (for example, chocolate and peanut butter would be dairy and protein). The total amount of points possible for the week would be 21, you know, 3 healthy meals a day!

I've skimmed the out-skirts of the Fat Smash Diet and the EXTREME Fat Smash Diet and although I am sure they are both successful when followed, I kept screwing up my glycemic index with my White Chocolate Mochas. I have not been successful in finding a diet that will incorporate my Caribou addiction, which is sad...really, really sad.

I've recently purchased The Biggest Loser interactive game for the Wii. Yes, I have a Wii. I bought my Wii in hopes of getting fit by using the Wii Fit....lmao...my kids have used the balance board as a table top for their snacks as they sit and watch TV. Anyhoooo....The Biggest Loser....I have not watched a full season of this show, but I've seen bits and pieces (cuz that's how I watch TV with a tween and 2 toddlers) and I get the gist of it. I've seen the progress of the contestants. I've seen the weigh-ins, and the eliminations. So, the other night I'm working my ass off (hopefully, literally). I'm doing "floating lunges", "mountain climbers", the warm up, and the cool down. I made it 3 rounds and guess what? I got freakin ELIMINATED!! Oh -Yes-I -did!! I was sweating, breathing heavy, and nearly in a cardiac arrest, and they eliminate me?? WTF??

I know what it is...the reason I can't stay on track....it's the tastings of Hamburger Helper as I cook it for the family. I cook it, taste taste taste it while cooking it, serve it...the family asks why I'm not eating and I say, "That?? You want me to eat THAT? I can't eat that, I'm on a diet...." ending with a big poor-me sigh. It's also the animal crackers, the pretzels, the fish crackers, the chips, the pieces of poptart that are shoved into my mouth as I try to say NO THANK YOU honey, sweetie, little munchkin of mine...thank you for sharing....and adding inches to my waistline....

My husband says there is nothing wrong with the way I look, in fact, I think he feels a good counselor would work more in my favor than any weight-loss program. I love him dearly, but....

If I look so good then why can't I sit down in my jeans?

If I look so good then why can't I cross my legs without holding the one on top in place so it stays put??

If I look so good, for Pete's Sake, why does the person in the mirror appear to

weigh 300 pounds?

Bottom line here, folks, even though I was eliminated with a capital E my first time with the Wii Biggest Loser, and even though today my body hurts so bad I can hardly lift my White Chocolate Mocha to my parched lips, I am going to get right back on the horse, or the Wii, and go for it! I will show you, Jillian Michaels, I am NOT a quitter!! I will not sit back and get ELIMINATED!

And I write this blog in memory of the Hot Fudge Sundae Poptart....

No Control....Yet!

Ok...So I am starting week 2 of the Body After Baby Challenge, and I must say, I have no control over anything when it comes to my weight loss! That must be why I signed up for this challenge when my baby is 19 months old! I finally decided it was time....well, I thought it was time, yet this past week I really didn't put my ALL into it. I am so disappointed in myself! All I needed to do was drink water. humph!! Sounds easy, right? Yes, it should have been, yet I didn't give it that much thought. I just drank my usual which was 3-4 glasses a day. My total points I got for that was 22 (1 point for each glass).

I don't really know what it is that is keeping me from being motivated! I wish I knew! Is it stress? Is it life in general? Is it work? Is it my need for my White Chocolate Mocha?? Please! Someone help me out here!

I've been exercising for the past 2 weeks. You might be saying Yeah for you!! But listen...I exercised once each week. Yep...that's it. And that was just walking on the treadmill for a half hour. I know I know....that won't do it! Obviously!!

So here we are in week 2 of this challenge brought to us by Mama Notes and I swear, I CAN do this! The mini-challenge is to WALK. For every 15 minutes of walking we get 1 point for the week. I just need to be able to walk away when the kids are killing eachother, go to the basement, and WALK on the freakin treadmill!! OMG! THAT is not difficult to do, is it?? In fact, instead of munching on these candy corn that I nicely put in this Fall dish (for decoration only), I should just stop what I am doing and go WALK!!

Sadly to say, I don't think I've lost anything this past week...weight wise....I've certainly lost a little bit more of my mind....and maybe one pound...but I'm sure that just came back with the candy corn!

Trust me when I say that losing weight is just about the worse thing in the world that anyone has to do...it ranks right on up there with a root canal!! Speaking of which...I better make that follow up for Phase II....since I had the first part done over a year ago! Good Lord I sound like a procrastinator!! A silly, over-stressed, over-weight, non-motivated PROCRASTINATOR! Don't you just love me? At least I can admit the truth....for Pete's Sake!

Why I Started to Blog...

I am no professional writer, of that I am certain. In fact, I probably don't have all the correct grammer and punctuation either. And maybe what I write isn't very pertinent to anything you are interested in. Or maybe what I write is just B-O-R-I-N-G.....(ok, you can stop nodding your head now, no need to be mean). So, why have I started a blog?

My main reason is that I need a scapegoat, an out, someone to listen without judgement. Most of the time I feel that's what most of us need, someone to just listen. We don't always need or want advice. We don't always want to hear "oh really? well, let me tell you what happened to me...." And that person will go on to tell you about their spousal problems, or how they locked their keys in the car, or how they bitched out the Caribou guy for being so damn annoying....and this isn't what I'm needing at this point. I just need to be able to say what I have to say and let it go. Don't need to think too much about it, just get it off my chest so I don't feel like I am suffocating half the time.

I haven't had it extremely easy for quite a few years, although "bad things" have stopped happening for right now. I've been through a divorce (after 9 months he said "maybe I'm not the marrying type". Oh REALLY??) I've been through the loss of a child (my son was stillborn when I was 8 months pregnant). I've been through the loss of my mother who was my most dearest friend in the whole world. I don't think one ever "gets over" losing a parent. Sure, we learn to live with it, but never, ever are we OVER it. I've been through the death of my spouse of 8 years (he was in a horrible accident).

On a good note, I've made it through all of those things. And yes, it is a lot to have happened in a short time. Not that other people haven't gone through just as many catastrophies, but sometims it takes a lifetime to go through all that. From that perspective, you'd think I was about 90 years old....and I'm not even half that!

Am I unscarred from all of it? Probably not. Do I have days that I find myself crying and I don't know why? Absolutely! I have found the strength and I have moved on. I have a daughter from my second marriage. Does she sometimes piss me off? Of course! She's a tween! She's also the reason I kept going instead of laying down and letting my life go when my husband (her father) passed away. She's the spark in each day that makes me smile.
I have married again. Pete's his name....as in Oh For Pete's Sake! Does he piss me off? Absolutely! But that doesn't mean I don't want him to be the one I snuggle up to at the end of each day. We have 2 toddlers, me and Pete, and they are my little miracles. Do THEY piss me off sometimes? Come on....they are TODDLERS!!

So, bottom line, I have a lot of pissed-offness bottled up inside unless I let it out. At this point, I don't want to continue to bitch my sister's ear off with my constant irritations, so I decided to start writing it down....here....in this blog. That's the new thing to do, right? Blog...what a word....for Pete's sake...where DOES that word come from??

As I searched to try to find the answer to "What is a Blog?" or where does the word come from, I came across this silly conversation which just made me chuckle. We all need a good chuckle now and then, right? Actually, I just like eavesdropping on conversations whether the people are in the next room, or on the internet....as much as I like for people to listen to me, I love to do the listening, even if uninvited.

Is It Fall Already??

The weather is changing faster than I recall it ever changing. It seems like yesterday I was complaining how hot I was. How I couldn't stand to be sweating all the time! Now...it's chilly, it's raining, and the leaves are falling! I guess that's what happens in the FALL! Honestly, I love Fall. I love the colors it brings, I love the smell of the crisp mornings, and I absolutely love Fall flowers and decorations.

Since I met my spouse in the Fall, it brings with it those nostalgic feelings of falling in love. It makes me want to cuddle with him, bring him his coffee in bed, and just BE with him. Am I sounding sappy? Yeah, I bet I am. Today started as one of those days. I said to Pete, "Let's go outside and start cleaning up the yard for winter." You know, put away the deck furniture, clean up the kids toys scattered around the sand box....the point is, I wanted to do it t-o-g-e-t-h-e-r. We have alot of things that need putting away, and alot of it goes into the shed. Now, let me tell you, I think I've been in the shed once. My late husband used to put all the stuff in and out of there, and I never needed to go there. So, with Pete, I just let him take over. NOW, when I am ready to put stuff away, he says, "I'm going to build a deck in there that can give us more space..." WHAT?? NOW??? When it's time to put the stuff away? I'm telling you, those warm fuzzy feelings went out the window with that one!!

So, I started clearing off the deck, piling chairs, chasing my 19 month old out of the garage, helping my 3 year old build her sand castle in what's left of the sand, telling my oldest "no, I am not looking for your hat with the peace sign on it right this minute", cleaning out coolers from 3 weeks ago.....and I thought, as I'm doing all this....what the H -E-double toothpicks is he DOING?? Is this something that he needs to do NOW when it's time to put the stuff IN the shed?? For Pete's Sake...is THIS what I signed up for?? I don't remember asking to be in this club. But here I am.

The kids got restless, I got ticked off, and Pete continued to empty the shed. Nothing got done. I gave up. I am not going to try to act on these feelings of "we should do this together", or "wouldn't it be fun if...", or "remember when...??" No, I am not. Instead, I am going to do my Fall decorating around the chaos. That's right...AROUND the chaos. And I am going to be happy doing it because even though I did not sign up for THIS, I did sign up for something, and that "something" includes all the ups and downs, the good and bad, the chaos and calm....I am here, and so is Pete, and so are the three little cave-people that we love with all our hearts. I wouldn't have it any other way! (well, except if that other way included a shed that was available to put my deck stuff in....) Happy Happy Fall to you All!!