Followers

Friday, January 7, 2011

Confess and Move On

I haven’t confessed for quite a while, so I’m pretty sure it’s time.  If you are way over-due for a confession, like I am, have no fear, you will not get struck down by the lighting of God, because we have Glamazon!!  and Mamarazzi!! 

That’s right!  Go ahead, link up and confess.  Then you can walk into that church on Sunday and feel proud that you’ve done your duty.

FridayConfessionalButton-1

 

I confess….

 

  • Being off for three days while I took the kids to the sitter’s anyways was really  nice.  I don’t know why I didn’t keep them home other than because I give up on obtaining Mother of the Year recognition I have to pay the sitter whether they are there or  not….
  • It blows my  mind that the sitter gets paid for not working…is this normal babysitting protocol??
  • I am nervous as hell about starting my new job on Monday.
  • I’ve done home-care for as long as I can remember (13 years) and I’m concerned that I might get a little psychotic while having to stay in ONE building for 8 fucking hours.
  • It’s killing me right this very moment to NOT video-tape Mr. Sake as he dances to “Just Dance KIDS”  for the Wii.  Oh yeah…it would be awesome! 
  • And by “Just Dance KIDS” I am talking “The Wheels on the Bus” and the “Chicken Dance”…”Bingo”…..yep….dance away, my Dear!!
  • I just broke the news to the spouse that this week’s grocery shopping will be the beginning of “OUR” diet.
  • He said, “WHAT diet??”
  • I don’t like to suffer alone.
  • Misery loves company, for Pete’s Sake!!
  • Seriously…three bagels and broccoli-cheese-potato chowder for a lunch is NOT a good idea….
  • Yes, I said THREE bagels.
  • Yes, that’s what the spouse brought for his lunch the other day.
  • I am sick…my sinuses are stuffed and painful, my head hurts…I can’t taste anything…Dagnabbit!!  I have a new job to start on Monday…I can NOT be sick!
  • ……………… – …………………………….
  • …………………….
  • ………………………….. Mrs. Sake will be right back, she’s video recording…………
  • ………………………………..
  • ……………………(and WTF does she mean by “OUR diet”???)

 

I confess….

  • Silly me, I forgot what can happen when I walk away from the computer with my blog window still up….
  • Some things are just not right…
  • Like this……

 

 

  • And some other things are just plain freaky….

 

freaky barbie

 

  • I confess that when the kids aren’t home, or even if they are in another room, I often get out a few black trash bags and clean house….and certain “things” end up in my bags.
  • I have no idea where that Barbie went.
  • She was there one minute…..

 

empty

Then….POOF!!  All. Gone.

  • This week I had an orientation day for my new job at the “corporate office”.  That meant an hours drive…on the freeway.  I confess that I HATE the muther-trucking freeway and all the asshats the drive it!
  • I do not like being forced to drive over 65 mph….they can all kiss my ass.
  • Seriously, I saw alot of THIS while driving the freeway….

finger

Is there any reason to be so rude? 

Ok…ok….I confess….I was the one doing the flippin off.

Don’t judge me.  I am only human.

 

Happy Friday!! 

9 comments:

Forgetfulone said...

Hilarious post! Good luck with your new job Monday.

Mamarazzi said...

so so so so funny.

and

mmmm bagels.

Rachel Murphy said...

love your post.. laughed all the way through it.

Kat said...

Why do we get sick with a new job? That happened to me!! TWICE! Good luck, girl. And I want to see a video of Mr. Sake doing the chicken dance...

Brittney said...

lol i throw toys out too and you best believe when im on a diet the whole fam is on a diet! LMAO!!

gayle said...

My daughter's baby sitter use to charge her if Bryson was sick or didn't come. She also had to pay her when she took vacation and when the sitter took vacation.

Wish I had that Wii Dance...mine's to hard!

You will do great at your new job!

Barbara Manatee said...

I stopped by from Rebecca's blog and laughed all the way through this. I'm sure I'll be back for more!!

Rebecca said...

That doll is just plain freaky...yes, throw it away.

I was so hoping to see Mr. Sake dancing!

Drive faster...love, a NY driver

Left you some blog love this weekend (yes, because I'm a loser and blog on the weekends).

Aubrey S. said...

I don't even mention the word diet to my husband. I just cook whatever we're having. If he doesn't like it, there's always PB&J (which is also part of the "diet" I follow - all-natural peanut butter, low-sugar and whole wheat bread is healthy).