Monday Mommy Moments

Link up with Frugal Vicki over at Frugal Mom Knows Best!!  She’s come up with a great meme that lets everyone share their magical mommy moments!  Awesome idea!  Oh, and show her some comment love too!!



Gosh…I usually have something off-color or mind-blowing to report on my craz yass little lovelies, but for some reason nothing is coming to mind.  I think because I had to work 2 night shifts in a row which meant I had to sleep for 2 days while the kids were up.  Therefore, I missed a lot of the shit funny stuff they pull.  Actually, I missed THEM….

 

 

Did I just say that?  Apparently I DO have a heart!!  Take THAT Tin Man!! 

Seriously, my Mommy Moment for the this past weekend was last night.  My body was still in the nightshift mode so I really didn’t understand why my spouse was getting his boxers all in a bunch over the kids still being awake and me just doing my thing…picking up toys, talking with the tween as she was getting ready for bed, tickling a toddler or two as I walked by even though the spouse was obviously trying to get them to settle down.  I felt like it was ohhhhh, maybe 8 pm or something. 

I was doing laundry, washing dishes, getting my stuff ready for work the next day….la la la…minding my own business when WHAM!!  The spouse lost it.  Literally.  He took Little Man off his lap, stormed into the bedroom where I was picking out my clothes for today, and said he was DONE.  I said , “done??”  He said, “as in going to bed, good night.”  Wow. 

He let Lil Lady snuggle in with him while I went and sat with Little Man to get him to settle.  Only then did I realize as I was searching the TV channel guide that it was 11pm!!  WTF was I thinking??  Keeping little ones up so late??? 

So I rocked with Little Man….and he chattered….and I rocked….and his eyes started closing.  He snuggled his arms up under the blanket and his Hippo pillow.  Then he looked at me….I could feel his big brown eyes on me but I was resisting looking at him because then the chatter would start all over again.

What did he do??  He took his little chubby hand, put it up to my face and turned my face to his and held it there.  Then he said, “Na-Nite”….smiled, closed his eyes and he was out.

OMG…do you know what a melting heart feels like?  Seriously….this little guy has me on the go from sun up to sun down…..he has me pulling out my hair…..gritting my teeth…cringing in fear….

Yet, he melted my heart with that gesture. 

And this is when I thought….I’m in love with my baby boy.

This was my Mommy Moment.  

Why Be A Nurse?

Usually I don't get to post on the weekends so this is a rare chance for me.  I just worked two night shifts in a row and have so many thoughts in my head that I thought it would feel good to get them out there.

Bottom line....??  I love the elderly.  I love their kindness.  I love their wit.  I love their spunk!

Many years ago I decided to become a nurse.  I am not sure why other than I love helping people.  It started with me being a nursing assistant on the weekends and then I pursued nursing school after I graduated high school.  I did not become a nurse for the money, although the pay isn't so bad.  I became a nurse because I love it.  That's right...it's not all blood, and sputum, and changing old people's diapers...it's more than that.  It's about what I can do for these people when they are sick.  How can I make them feel better when they are coughing their heads off because of pneumonia?  How can I make them feel like they still have dignity when they are no longer able to make it to the bathroom on their own?  How can I show them that they are still important to this world when they no longer have family to visit them or anyone that CARES enough to visit them?  How can I do all this?

I do homecare during the day, and I can honestly tell you that my patients are like part of my family.  I go above and beyond to show them that they matter.  I've been known to shovel their walkways, dig in their garages for their medications after they have moved to a low-income home where all their shit was thrown  into the garage and nobody was their to help.  I've gone out to see these people on my off days for free when they have called me because they weren't feeling well.  I've mopped floors, done laundry, grocery shopped....and none of these things are what I get paid for.  I get paid for making my nursing assessment, filling pill boxes, doing dressing changes, calling doctors, and teaching them about their health issues. 

I go above and beyond because I care.  I see the look in their eye when I bring them a fresh coffee or when I offer to make them some tea and toast.....that look shows how much these little things are appreciated.  And to me, THAT is what makes a good nurse.

Anyone can learn the fundamentals of nursing.  Anyone can learn side effects of medications to look for.  Even a monkey can learn to give an injection.....but can you teach someone how to have compassion?

I think not.

We have a nurse that will visit her patients and spend maybe 10 minutes taking their vitals signs.  That's ALL she does.  She doesn't even take her coat off and sit down for a few minutes to chat.  How wrong is this??  How can she call herself a nurse? 

Not too long ago one of my patients called me to see if I could help her with her cable because she forgot to pay her bill.  Well, I couldn't pay her bill, but I sent my husband to her house to rig up her cable so that she could have some of the basic channels until her cable was turned back on.  In return, she made him an apple pie.  Now...how sweet was that??

Another time I volunteered my late spouse to go trim someones bushes because this little old man couldn't get out to do it, his son wouldn't help, and I had to literally wade through prickly bushes to get to his front door.  How do families let their loved ones live in these conditions?  Of course, I will never know the whole story behind what goes on with their family dynamics, but damn....help your elderly parents out!!!  Help them when it's needed....show them they deserve to be cared for.  They already feel like a burden, and probably don't want to ask for the help, but damn you....they raised you!!  They deserve your respect!!

I also work part time at a nursing home.  I said I would never go back to working in one, but times are tough and we needed the money...so I go....and I love the residents there.  Do I like the nursing staff??  Not so much.  I swear they are there to work at NOT doing the work more than they are there to take care of the people. 

How hard is it to go get a lady a sleeping pill from the facility stock??  Must have been too hard for the nurse I followed because she dated the order for the following day.  Not me...I went and opened that starter kit and got the sleeping pill...and my lady slept peacefully all night.  Isn't that our goal??  To make them comfortable??  Another lady told me she asked for a sleeping pill three times and was told she didn't have one ordered.  I was all set to call the doc for an order, but when I looked at her med sheet there it was plain as day....Restoril 30 mg po qhs as needed for sleep.  She also slept like a baby.  :)  Isn't it easier to just do the work? 

Does this make me comfortable knowing my Grandmother is in this same nursing home where I work?  Not one bit.  I cringe when I think about it.  My Gramma cannot speak up for herself.  She would not know if she was getting the right medication or any medication for that matter.  Who's going to watch out for her?  We have to put our trust in nurses that don't give a shit??  We have to trust nurses who chart that a patient can move all extremities and hand grasps are equal after this lady took a fall.....when this lady has a history of hemiplegia secondary to a stroke years ago??  Therefore, this lady CANNOT move her right side, and hasn't for years.  Did the fall cure her of her hemiplegia??  Nope...not on my shift.

I wish there was more I could do for these people.  I hope that the 8 hours I am there that they know they are in good hands.  I may not do all the extra paperwork for the stupid shit...like, for example, we are supposed to fill out at least 3 or 4 different sheets when we find a new bruise, or an open area, or a tiny little scratch on someone.....I deal with the problem, make sure there was no apparent foul play, and move on.  I get the appropriate order for a dressing change if needed.....I do what I know is right, and I move the fuck on!!  Damn!  You could spend all day writing up incident reports, calling directors and doctors and the fucking Pope....but does that help the patient??  Not in my opinion.  I think most intelligent people know if someones been rough-housed or if they bumped their arm on the bed rail.  Just saying....

My sister over at 2010-Year of Miracles is on her way to getting her nursing degree.  Notice I didn't say she's on her way to "becoming a  nurse"?  That's right...because she has the compassion it takes to take care of people.  She already has the common sense.  If she could work right now as a nurse, she would be just fine.  Her patients would know she was there for them as their advocate.  They would know they were getting the best care.  They wouldn't even question if she had a degree because she would SHOW them she KNOWS  how to take care of people!  And, THAT is precisely my point....she has what it takes to be a nurse...she only needs the paperwork out of the way.  Some of the nurses I work with??  Yeah...I sort of question where they obtained their degree....it's quite scary....I had  no idea Cracker Jack started putting nursing degrees in the prize pack!!

So, the reason for this post?  I really just want to say that from my viewpoint, the elderly deserve respect.  They deserve us, as nurses and family members, to be their voices.  We need to speak up for them when needed.  We need to give them the care the deserve when they are in need of it.  We need to treat them the way we would want to be treated.  I truly believe what comes around - goes around.  I can only hope that when I am elderly that I have someone to step up to the plate for me if I don't have family available or if I have nurses that don't do their job. 

I am a nurse and I love my job.  I love my patients and I am here to say what they cannot say for whatever reason.  I am here to be their messenger. I am here tell the families that have abandoned them, and to tell the nurses that don't follow through, and to tell the nursing assistants that make up their vital signs....ONE THING.  I know that most of my patients would be grateful to me for passing this information along to anyone who may need to be put in their place....so, to those of you who don't deserve to be the caregives of these elderly folks....THIS is what I say on their behalf:

And have a great day!!

What The Hell?? Irish Fairies??

Happy St. Patrick’s Day to all of you!  Link up if you’d like with these ladies over at Blue Monkey Butt for What the Hell Wednesday!



In the past I’ve been known to go out on the town wearing my Irish drinking glove, drinking some sort of green drinks (not beer…I don’t do beer) until I’ve passed out become so happy that nothing in the world can bother me.

This year, I have resorted to sitting in my car behind Caribou blogging about Irish Fairies because I don’t really have a life anymore, I have 3 children, and I am now much more responsible. 

I came across this site on Irish Heritage.  You can check it out if you’d like.  It’s called The Irish Path.  One of the topics discussed is Irish Fairies.  I cringe every time I type “f-a-i-r-i-e-s” because apparently they do not like to be called “f-a-i-r-i-e-s”.  So what the fuck are we supposed to call them??  I guess it’s okay if you refer to them as “them” or “The Other Crowd” or even “The Wee Folk”. 

I thought about this a moment and it made me think of how many times we say “they say you should do (insert blah blah blah here)” or “they say consuming 20 white chocolate mochas a week is bad for you”…..yeah, who are THEY??  Apparently THEY are the Irishfuckingfairies!!!  Damn!  Who knew??

I am probably going to cursed by “them” for writing this post.  Maybe I should apologize in advance. 

Dear WEE FOLK…please forgive me for anything that may sound condescending towards you.  I do not mean any harm.  Please do not curse me with a Fairy Stroke!!

Ok…that should do it. 

Did you KNOW they can be mean little Wee Folk??  I did not until I read it over on The Irish Path.  These cute little beings of The Other Crowd can throw Fairy Darts at you!!  And yeah, these fairy darts hurt like a muthafucka!!  They can cause “swelling in your hands and feet or BOTH!!”  There is a remedy for this, but you have to be certain to remove the dart otherwise it won’t matter how much damn butter you put on your hands and feet!

These little beings can also cause sinus infections and blindness!!  Holy SHIT!!  That must be what’s wrong with me!!  I need to call my doc now!!  Maybe my brain isn’t leaking but I have a whopping sinus infection from the damn Wee Folk!! 

WHAT THE HELL??

Does THIS fairy look like she could do such harm??



Maybe THIS one…??

 

Now I’m thinking I need to be one of these f-a-i-r-i-e-s because I certainly would like at least ONE of their awesome powers!!  Can you imagine??  When that old bitty backed into me yesterday at the drive thru I could have just maimed her with a fucking fairy dart!!

May the Luck of the Irish be with you today and each day after!! 

And you know what THEY say…..

Don’t piss off the fairies!!!

Post-It Notes and Dimwit Drivers

It’s time to link up with Supah over at Adventures of a WannaBe SupahMommy!!  May the stickie-force be with you on Post-It Note Tuesday!!



I certainly needed some sort of “force” to be with me this morning.  Little Man who normally sleeps until 8:30 was up at 6:30.  Lil Lady was up right around 6:45….

I still wasn’t done getting ready but I was going in and out of the bathroom trying to wake the tween up for school.  The spouse was…..I don’t know….I think he was trying to help in some way so I better give him credit for that.

The babysitter comes, I get t0 leave the madness!!  Yahoooooo!!  I’m free!!  I go to my first normal stop….Caribou Coffee House.  While pulling up to the drive thru I notice a car half way in between the ordering spot and the pick up window.  Then I see the tail lights go on…..then I think to myself , “Self….back the fuck up!!”  So I put myself in reverse just as this person starts backing up to the ordering spot….

Guess who was quicker??  Yep…the little old lady that passed up the ordering spot!!

WHAM!!


Therefore….
























             










So….everyone have a lovely day and I hope the forces are with you because they weren’t with ME! 

     

Mommy Moments!

Oh this is right up my alley because with 2 toddlers and a tween, how can I NOT have Mommy Moments??  It would be absolutely impossible not to laugh at the worst of times…..after all, if you can’t laugh, you might as well buy your plot now because you’ll never survive!!

Mommy Moment Mondays! brought to you by Frugal Vicki over at Frugal Mom Knows Best.  You know we all have them. That beautiful moment that makes you realize you are a mom, the moment that something you swore you would never say comes out of your mouth, those moments you couldn't even make up if you tried? Well, let's share shall we? Those moments in which we are pulling our hair out, trying not to cry, laugh, or scream. Moments we think we would never see, and moments we think we will never laugh at?  LINK UP or I think Frugal Vicki said something about becoming the spam queen.....



So…here’s one of my moments.

And I must add,  this moment has happened over and over and OVER since beginning the potty-training with Lil Lady.  It starts off with me being the organized mom….I have a bag of prizes, I have tons of stickers, I have a potty that will play music…..and I also have a Little Man who thinks HE needs to sit on the potty.  Lil Lady is 3 1/2 and Little Man just turned 2.

Me to Lil Lady:  "Time to pottyyyyyyyyy!!  Are you ready?" (said in my sing-songy voice I use to make it sound like something fun)

Lil Lady: "No."

Me: "Oh come on…..I have stickerrrrrs!" (sing-songy voice again)

Lil Lady:  "nuh-uh."

Little Man: "Me Me Me!!!"

Me: "Don’t you wanna hear it play musicccc???"  (Sing-songy voice getting a bit weaker)

So I take Lil Lady’s hand and drag her princess ass walk her gently to the potty chair.  You notice I didn’t say “walk her to the bathroom”, because the potty chair is NEVER where it’s supposed to be.  Little Man likes to use it to get up on the highest of places.  He also uses the diaper boxes and his newest item to use as a step stool is his new Sit-n-Spin.  You got it…..


Lil Lady is already starting to pull away, Little Man is getting all excited and trying to pull his pants down.  Lil Lady has her knees clamped together so I CAN’T get HER pants down.  I’m tackling Lil Lady…..Little Man has his pants and diaper half off….Lil Lady is getting louder and more insistent that she is NOT sitting on the pot….Little Man is still saying “Me Me Me!!”

I am breaking a sweat now.

Me:  "Lil Lady!!!  I have a fucking bag of prizes for Pete’s sake!!!!"

Little Man:  "Me Me!!!!"

Oh.  Good. Lord. You. Have. Got. To. Be. Fucking. Kidding. Me.

I finally get a hold of Lil Lady in a death grip turn to sit her little tushy on the pot and Little Man already has his ass on there!  I try to get him off one-handed, this allows Lil Lady some freedom from my death grip and she’s free….

But what does she do??  The sweet Lil Lady that didn’t want to sit on the potty in the first place?  She goes over to Little Man, uses all her power and basically karate chops him off the pot and then says, “It’s MY turn!!”



He’s laying on the floor, she’s towering over him, and she adds….”and YOU don’t PUSH!!”

Wow!!

It ends with neither one of them peeing on the potty, Lil Lady is ticked off, Little Man is planning his revenge and I’m ready for some caffeine and Xanax.

Can potty training be any more fun??

Go on…go link up with Frugal Vicki!!  Every Mom has some Mommy Moments!!

Confession Time

Since I somehow forgot about missed last Friday Confessional, I think I probably have a double load of shit confessions this week.  If you feel like confessing and cleansing your soul so you may confess more next week enjoy your weekend, hop on over to Glamazon’s site and confess away for Friday Confessional.

First and foremost I need to get this one off my chest….because for some reason it’s bothering me right at this very moment…..

• Sometimes…not ALL the time, mind you…the tween just won’t SHUT UP!  Like for example, when we are at Border’s and I’m trying to BLOG and she is showing me every single page in this dog breeder book and every 2 seconds I have to look up at what she is showing me…..yeah….these are the times that I could just about scream!!  But I won’t scream here…at Borders…..

• Sometimes I totally forget I’m supposed to be on a diet.
• I often argue with myself over having yet one more white-chocolate-mocha-no-whip-please….
• When I say “argue with myself”, I mean it literally.  You know, yelling at myself out loud, then yelling back at myself…out loud.  Pretty embarrassing for both of me.
• I secretly wish my name was Grace, or Lila or something that sounds like it has some class….Terry just sounds so……blah.  I prefer my spouse to call me Queen.
• I confess for screaming FUCK YOU! to the person that was honking at me to turn left when I couldn’t otherwise I would have totaled my vehicle.  Not that there is anything wrong with screaming FUCK YOU! unless there is a tween present.  Pretty sure I got bumped from first place for Mom Of  The Year…..
• Sometimes I sneak off to bed without the spouse and insist the next morning that I DID try to wake him up from the recliner.  I swear I DID!!
• I look in the mirror and see someone that others don’t see.  Why is that??  I wish the person I saw was the one that my sister saw last Saturday…you know the one….the one that she feels doesn’t need to lose any weight.  Yes, that would be the one I would like to see.  Unfortunately, I see someone that needs to lose a ton of poundage.  Sad….so sad.
• I’m confessing early for beating the crap out of my BFF’s spouse for not going to the ER when he was told…for an infection in his knee….What’s wrong with these men???  Suck it up and GO!!
• Sometimes I stare out into space and see…..nothing.  Abso-fucking-lutely NOTHING!!  Does that mean I need therapy of some sort?
• I think my brain has stopped leaking for now although I confess that I am still worried about the spinal fluid that was on my kitchen floor…..I wonder if I should have obtained a sample for the doc….
• I confess to getting a little uptight when my shoe stuck to the carpeting at my patient’s home.  I probably shouldn’t have said, “WHAT THE FUCK??”  and I probably shouldn’t have gagged when I walked in the bedroom, and most certainly could have held back the groan when I opened the microwave to warm up my coffee.  But….seriously….this man has a HOMEMAKER!!!  That means his HOME should be MADE!!
• I also confess to to sort of shoving a little too hard removing a patient’s flea-infested cat off my coat.  I could have been a bit more gentle.  And when one of the other 12 cats attached it’s front claws to my thigh??  Yeah, I probably could have gently scolded it instead of giving it a swirlie ride in the commode. 

Forgive me, Glamazon, so I may have a peaceful weekend!! 
And happy happy weekend to everyone!!   I will be back next week….yeah, I say this because I know how my weekends go…my poor little laptop sits there begging me to come on over…yet I can only get so close before I am detoured to break up a toddler fight or to help the tween read the directions on a box of mac-n-cheese…or to show the spouse where the broom is…for the kazillionth time…..yeah, my weekends are pretty much shot.  So…as I was saying, enjoy YOURS and I’ll be back on Monday!!

Is My Brain Leaking?

Alrighty…it’s time to link up with one or both of the lovely sponsors below for What the Hell Wednesday and What I Meant to Say!!  Just do it…I’m not in the mood to beg!!





Ok, here’s a little history of me before I get into my story for this lovely Wednesday.  Basically, I have sinus issues.  I take Claritin D every day otherwise I can’t stay awake my nose gets stuffed up.  My doctor is aware of this and believes I am addicted to Claritin D and does not feel I should take it everyday.  I’ve asked him for something else to become addicted to to help me stay awake my sinuses but he hasn’t come up with anything yet.

I know I need to make a doc appointment because soon I will be out of the water pill that he ordered when I held him at gunpoint because I was gaining weight he felt I was retaining a little bit of fluid in my ankles.  Also, I’ve been hearing….feeling?….some crackling in my left ear.

I like my doctor, after all, I’ve worked closely with him in a nursing capacity and he “adopted” me when I couldn’t get into my previous doctor and I thought I was dying.  Turns out I just had bronchitis at that time….but ya never know, right??

That’s the thing…my sis and I have a fear of the worse….if we stub our toe, it’s BROKEN; if we have a pain somewhere, we are certain it’s a tumor, and most importantly, if we have a headache??  Yep, it’s most likely an aneurysm.  Sorry, that’s just how we think.  It’s either hereditary or the way we were raised, but at least every other day we are dying.  Go check out her blog before she kicks the bucket!!  You can find her at 2010-Year of Miracles!  Hurry!!

Anyhoozle….this is what happened to me the other day while helping the tween put dishes away because you know, she’s lived here for 12 years and still doesn’t know where they go…..

All was well, the tween wasn’t bitching about having to put the dishes away, we were laughing, joking….the spouse was not home so there was no fighting and no “life lessons” on why it’s important to know where the dishes go.  It was nice.  Until……I bent over to pick something up and I felt something dripping from my nose.  At first I thought, OH SHIT!!  I got a bloody nose!! and I grabbed my nose quickly…..
 

When I got the balls felt brave enough to look, what did I see?? 

NO BLOOD!!!!

WHAT THE HELL?????

Seriously….why was their clear…..I repeat C-L-E-A-R drops of fluid on my kitchen floor?  From. My. Nose.

WHAT THE HELL is THAT????  I DONOTHAVEARUNNYNOSE because IAMADDICTEDTOCLARITIND!!!  So, why on earth would my nose drip??  Where did it come from??  Is my BRAIN LEAKING??  OMFG!! 

Because I am a nurse, I am certain it’s cerebral spinal fluid coming out my nose.  I’m sure it has nothing to do with having sinus issues and a crackling ear for the past 3 weeks.  So, what do I do?  I call my sister, of course!!

I tell her about the fluid….the CLEAR fluid….and she says….

“Oh my fucking lord!!  I hope it’s not cerebral spinal fluid!!!”

Me: WHY WOULD YOU SAY SUCH A THING??????!!!!!

Sis: Oh shut up, you know you thought it too!!

Yep…thank you, Dear Sister, for putting my worries to rest.

Now what??  You got it, I have to call my doc for an appointment.  I call….get the answering service stating someone will be in the office at 1 pm.  I call at 1:02pm……no answer.  I call at 1:03pm…no answer.  Finally someone answers at 1:04pm.

“Dr. H’s office, how may I help you?”

Me:  I need to make an appointment for a possible leaking brain….

*****crickets*****

Seriously, I told her I  needed an apointment ASAP with the doc….that I will be running out of my water pill and I had a few “other issues” going on that I felt needed immediate attention.  She says, “ok….how about April 24th….ummmm….2pm?”

Me:  Wait….aren’t we in March??

Her:  Yes we are.

Me: Ok…if that’s the soonest you have available….



You got it…..WHAT I MEANT TO SAY was THIS:

“Listen here you secretary-without-a-brain!!  My fucking brain is leaking!!  The last time you made me wait for an appointment was when I told you I thought I was losing my fucking mind….now it’s leaking and you can’t get me in there TODAY????  I know I sound ridiculous, but can’t you have a heart and take care of me??  Didn’t I give the doc a break when he kept forgetting that he never addressed my hip pain???  Sure I did!!  I promise not to roll my eyes when he asks me to tell him yet once again what “we” did to fix my tennis elbow that he NEVER fixed.  Please have mercy on me….if I drip any more brain fluid on my kitchen floor I am seriously afraid it’s going to excite me just enough to blow this aneurysm that my sister and I are certain we both have!  At that time I will certainly be going after your ass!!”

**pause**

“What?  Oh, yes, ma’am…I can be there at 3 today….thankyouverymuch”

And that’s my story…..Now, if you’ll excuse me, I am going to go sit down and not do any bending over….because, well….you just never know…..

Happy Wednesday everyone!!